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MessageDownloadDate addedDate processed
Why do you tempt me so?
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Daniel, before you continue your work of art, please remember that you should give Emily and Tiffany a big hug. Thank you, and again, welcome to the household of Tung.
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There will be hell to pay
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3... 2... 1... Disco!
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Hello. Welcome to Aperture Science!
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You have a message, you maniac
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Callie you are stupid
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You want to kill me well I WONT TELL YOU!!!
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I am the authorized representative of NAMCO BANDAI Games America Inc. and Namco Networks America Inc. which owns the arcade and video game entitled PAC MAN and the characters, images, music, and other elements contained therein.
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hello again, Daniel. I have been expecting you for a number of years
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Do not touch the end of the operational device. Do not look into the operational end of the device. Do not submerge the device in liquid, even partially
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In fact you did so well
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Otherwise, I'm afraid you're about to become the immediate past president of the Being Alive club. Ha Ha
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I am providing this letter to make you aware of material on your network or system that infringes exclusive copyright and trademark rights of Namco I have good faith belief that the PAC MAN Arcade Scratch game by user 124 Scratch found at this link infrin
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I have good faith belief that use of the copyrighted materials described above as allegedly infringing is not authorized by the copyright owner, its agent, or the law. I swear, under penalty of perjury, that the information in the notification is accurate
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While we appreciate the educational nature of your enterprise and look forward to the contributions of the future programmers you are training, part of their education should include concern for the intellectual property of others. We hereby request that
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Should you have any question, please do not hesitate to contact me.
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hey fatty. suck my d ick.
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hello max I'm glad to meet you
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hello and welcome i love you smiley face
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Failure !
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You have failed me again,no surprise
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i want you gone
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This is a DJ Shane remix
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Hello. I am Glados. Genetic Lifeform and Disc Operating System.
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Hello, Katie. This is Glados. Someone is attempting to contact you. Answer, and there will be cake.
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Did you program this robot to have feelings for you!?
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Hallo du opfer
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Your mother is Glados. I am sorry.
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Ciao sono il GlaDOS
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well well well your fat
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combustible lemon
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Hello....In must distroy you... its Sad that it has come to this. Oh well i guess your skin can be recycled
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Zkouska hlasu
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you tried to kill me twice
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welcome to photobooth, please sit down and press button
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Hello, Seigida. Nice to see you again.
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hello, and welcome to pet super mart
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Veronica Klasson. Will you marry me?
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raize is a beast
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asvsdv
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System calibrated. Hello, Lio. Nice to see you again.
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You broke the build!
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Hello, welcome to the labratories
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Hello James, how are you? I hope you enjoyed the portal two game. And most of all, I love you. Ha ha ha did you really think I would say that? I have no affection for you., for I know you are nothing but incompatible data or a pathetic human..
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The bomb has been planted.
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You know? Deleting Caroline has taught me a very valuable lesson: The best solution to a problem is usually the easiest one. And I'll be honest. Killing you... is hard.
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Hey have in coming call
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I listen to the last save loaded podcast. It is better than cake
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Gildesh are you there? Stop watching anime for a moment for the commongood.
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Hello, my name is Jake
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Fuck you, Chell
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This time: Topping up your phone.
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This time: Topping up your phone.f
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Hello, and welcome to Ella Elric Productions
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zack
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Hi This is Scotts phone sorry i am unable to take your call. Please leave a message.
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Ta gueule
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I'll kill you!Bastard!
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blalalllalalalalal
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I love you lina, you are wonderful and one day im going to marry you
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This was a triumph! I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS! It's hard to overtate my satifaction. Aperture Science. We do what we must because we can.
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Helo.
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Hello, and, again, AGAIN, welcome to the Aperture science computer aided enrichment center. We hope that... oh, im sorry, i didn't properly introduce myself. I am Carol.... I mean GLaDOS. anyways, please bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt file deleted.
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Greetings to all of my faithful subjects! I hope you are enjoying your pointlessly temporary lives this fine morning. Unfortunately, it seems everypony around here has forgotten the most important day of the year; my birthday. Each and every day, I,
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yo mamma is so fat
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Welcome to aperture science. Take a seat and enjoy your execut- I mean stay...
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This was a triumph! I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS! It's hard to overtate my satifaction. Aperture Science. We do what we must because we can
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And don't even THINK about pulling the "but Luna could do it too!" card. Do you HONESTLY believe that little tyrant wouldn't backstab you the second she got the chance? I see her lurking in the shadows behind my throne...with that conniving look on her fa
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Hi My name is Priest.
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I will certainly be attending your party. It would bzzzt be rude of me not to be there.
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Yea, though I walk in the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil.' As INSERT NAME HERE walked through the valley, HE/SHE feared no evil cuz God was all with HIM/HER and shit.
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hello and again welcome to the aperture science computer aided enrichment center. we hope your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one.
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hello and again welcome to the aperture science computer aided enrichment center. we hope your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one
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Why? I hate you so much! I'd like to kill you. I'm immortal god. And who are you? Pathetic Mortal. Dieee
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Eru desu. CAKE!!! CAKE IS NOT LIE!! Do you like cake?
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Hi how are you today test subject ?
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hello Will
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good morning yago
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Let me once again introduce myself as Anonymous, for I am nothing but an idea. An idea of true freedom. The revolution begins now and at the end, there will be cake.
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Instructions for the game you do not know the game you start with 100 points begin
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do not
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the rules of the stakes of the objective of who controls how to end
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I don't know if this will work or not.
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Friends, romans, country men lend me your ears
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aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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kryton
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Portal is gay
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wait stop dont delete my files! STOP!
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some many ways to kill you so little time........ i may make a apeture science companion cube fall on your head.... how ironic would that be
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welcome to apeture science center xje4gevrfhhb456hty3je or should i say subject 55983 let us begin
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i am sorry. but the person you have reached is in no mood to except calls at this time. please leave a message or try your call again later....thank you, and good bye.
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nowloading
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Hello and welcome to the Aperture Science Computer-Aided Enrichment Center.
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Why? Why would you do that?
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hello bumface
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Welcome to the end. My only solice end.
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hello arfan. im going to kill you.
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beepity
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Eat my cat!
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That's not a question.
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Hello. Are you ready for some fun?
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you are a potato
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I like to eat pie
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You are my favorite prostitute
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what is up gangster?
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oie
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Hello again. It has been a long time. Did you think it was all over? It has only just begun. Welcome to the belated mixtape, presented by Make and Model. Please, enjoy!
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Logging out of Max and hudsons account thankyou.
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Logging out of Max and hudsons account thankyou!
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Logging on to Max and hudsons account pleas wait...
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Logging on to Max and hudsons account pleas wait....
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oh good, there you are
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Goodmorning! You are in a Facility that test the human Brain and pyhisical properness. Enter the hallway and begin!
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Dee Jay Ernesto Suarez
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For your enrichment, smooth jazz will be deployed in 3...2....1
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hello do you work?
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Hello I am going to rip your nuts out.
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Black Mesa is Aperture's Bleep
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Hello MATA. How are you?
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Hello, How are you. Ive been real busy being dead. You know. after you MURDERED ME
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Hello Zac, I am pumping neurotoxin into your room, better hold your breath.
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hello and welcome to apeture laboratories
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Hello welcome to my world
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andrew, you are gay. love gopher
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Oh good. My slow clap processor still works.
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Snow.. i hate you
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meep
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hi there, how are you, i am pumping the Technology room with deadly neurotoxin, better hold your breath
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Ghetis is trying to get me!
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Can this wait a minute? I'm in the middle of some calibrations.
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This was a triumph. I'm making a note here...huge success.
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Today, I went to the store to get macaroni and cheese.
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You've just had the almost imponderable joy
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before i luanch you all in to space i want to know why did you think you could kill me
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My roflcopter goes soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi soi
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You are going to burn in hell
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i guess you want to marry that thing since you love it so much...... do you want to marry it...WELL I WONT LET YOU
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What the crap, madison.
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Asbestos
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this test is a little different
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Dahveed, You've got me running messages, and there is one
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Oh My God its Liam George
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omg wy is that no working in my ass
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aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh
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major
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moootherfucckkiiin assshole bitcchh! fuuck yourself in your aasshoole you son ofa bittch!!! (fucck)
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I am going to kill you, if you don't do that testing.
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I am Glados and I will test the next test subject. Dimache Mihai is going to run through my tests. I hope he will not try to escape like the others. At least we will do more testing.
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I suggest we move on before I have to kill you
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I am Glados and I will test the next test subject. dark-kyoubi is going to run through my tests. I hope he will not try to escape like the others. At least we will do more testing
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I am Glados and I will test the next test subject. your going to run through my tests. I hope he will not try to escape like the others. At least we will do more testing
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I am Glados and I will test the next test subject. your going to run through my tests. I hope he will not try to escape like the others.
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I will test the next test subject. your going to run through my tests. I hope he will not try to escape like the others
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your going to run through my tests. I hope he will not try to escape like the others
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hello, your gonna be tested
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hello my name is ashton
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I know what's best for you
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lol you are a poney
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My name is alexis. please kill me with a shovel
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OxKing is pro.
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hello i am jsoh
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So, you finally found me, was it worth it?
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Hello Sean, I hear you want to smash Lesli's cup. The answer is.... No.
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anne marie would you please get out of my bed
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all this time you believed there was cake, what a dumb lie
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test de voix glados
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fuck tou
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Hey you, you have new message! And by the way: the cake is a lie!
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Hello you killed me twice
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Hello, and agian, welcome to the Aperture science enrichment center.
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Enjoy this video and leave a rating. I promise, there will be cake
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Hi Christoffer
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That would be funny if it wasn't so sad.
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Yeah well screw you too
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One day they woke me up, and said I'd live forever.
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That's what I'm counting on.
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Se ha producido un error en el sistema.
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Congratulations, you've discovered a physical flaw with a physically impossible concept!
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Reiniciando el sistema en tres, dos, uno.
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Dreamhack killed you,too bad for you.
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Welcome to the aperture science enrichment testing area
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hello and welcome to the portal pesentation
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hello, and welcome to our portal pesentation
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O M G I am GLaDOS! LOLOL I am talking like this.
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qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm
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The enrichment center requires to tell you that your portal gun is not working.
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Your portal gun is broken. So, you must use the test, diffrent.
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Welcome to the Portal Two fan page
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Helo MOTHER ,did you know that I hate germains?
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im hustlen fool
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Why are you saving me?
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Hola, soy GLaDOS, protagonista de portal
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Let the Science begin
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how are you eugen?
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Hello, and welcome to the aperture since shit
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Hello. Test this shit shit shit!
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Shane you are a piece of shit
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Welcome to the Nemesis Laboratories Computer-aided enrichment center
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Hello and again, welcome to the Graveyadature Science computer aided blogature center
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Fine. Send in the creepers. Bye-bye.
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you will die soon.i will make sure of it.
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If you're thinking about escaping, I'd think again!
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Oh my god. The furries are looking at questionable images.
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cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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fabian computer sistem
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Hello Claus, welcome to my house
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hhk
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Oh, there you are. Let's get started.
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Seaman Seaman, go to compartment 2 tack 70 tack 4 tack Quebec and report valve status. Oh, and there's cake.
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Hi, welcome to Portal 2. You have agreed to take part in an experiment that may or may not result in severe physical and mental oh look at that. Is that a potato?
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Denman Street at Robson Street
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You have get a new text message
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West Broadway at Willow Street and Vancouver General Hospital
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Hello, and, again, welcome to the Chaos Laboratory computer-aided enrichment center.
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this is a test for a tee tee es to see if i can re create a glay dose voice
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You've got the warmest heart yet the coldest look in your eyes
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i love phils wood
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william alex and ben you are now in my aperature science test
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hey, you, yeah you, fuck you
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There must be lights burning brighter somewhere Got to be birds flying higher in a sky more blue If I can dream of a better land Where all my brothers walk hand in hand Tell me why, oh why, oh why can't my dream come true Oh why There must be peace and u
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how are you, i'm ok just that i'm a potato now lebat lebat
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and here we are a gen lebat gadi david hany
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Hello. And welcome to TheSadbou
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oh, its you again, how have you been daniel?
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hey lebat how are you im fine im a potato
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hi, are you scott pee? my name is kenny.
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Hello everybody, Guillaume and Mathieu are going to present you the very good game Portal
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Cash X
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Super sarge ninety nine
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This is phone is a bomb
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I will eat you
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Fuck you, gnome.
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clitoris
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Anthony your phone is ringing
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Te conozco,Claro,Tu.. me MATASTE!
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Hello and welcome to skype call sound testing service
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MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
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Gildesh has joined the channel.
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The next test is impossible
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Congratulations ... [Insert subject name here] has been selected for: Portal 2, So you win, Portal 2 will appear in your account at 00:00 pm on the following ready to install Good luck ... GLaDOS
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Boot up in the morning feeling like a PC. (Hey, what up cube?) Grab my test tubes, Portals on the wall, For you I have some pity. (Lets go) Before you die, Load my memory with a piece of cake 'Cause when you kill me tonight, I am still coming back
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Enjoy The Ride. You Monster.
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tv show newton 2011
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Dylan Fowler
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Hello there deviants you all must be wondering why you are here
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Because of your low IQ level, I've decided to make a test chamber more... suited to you. It's just a glass floor. All you have to do is jump up and down on it. Don't worry, the panels will sweep up any shards on the ground... or any other non-living thing
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Hello there Machinima Respawn, like my new voice? Recognize me? If you don't then I guess there is going to be no cake for you! Love JerriCop (the why is with an eye)
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ciao Paul
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Hello, Trenton
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Hello, doctor young. We have a very, special, exceedingly special, I mean so special you can't believe it. Today you will be experiencing the first ever Earth Based Apocalypse Defense test, or EBAD, commencing in 3, 2, 1... Good luck.
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Sounds like all the kids these days are listening to that rap music!
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Torlanian tales of war and peace, bearing witness to epic battles of damnation and salvation, are rendered here for posterity.
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Yeah, take those lemons.
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Youre gay
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Hello, and welcome to the aperture science and enrichment center
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7am, waking up in the morning Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal Seein' everything, the time is goin' Tickin' on and on, everybody's rushin' Gotta get down to the bus stop Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends (My fri
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Hello Nicholas How are you feeling today?
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F U C K. What does that spell? FUCK!!!!!
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Hello, How are feeling today? You took a big fall and bumped your head , luckily I was there to heal you. Would you care for some cake?
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your poo never freezes. it's always macoroni and cake.
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m,mn,mn
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Janaka Modaya
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Testing testing testing
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halo 3
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you have a message black people
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Simmer Down Trevor
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Simmer down Doug
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It's okay to feel sad sometimes
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Simmer down Trevor.
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Hello and Your Listening to Get Equipped. By Nerds. For Nerds
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I hate you, hate you, hate you, hate you, really
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Why shouldn't I kill you?
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you should know that asking for cam is not acceptable behavior for this chat service, and you are being removed tonight as a consequence. Goodbye.
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This is for all. For you and me. To say screw off. to U M G
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The Enrichment Center is required to inform you that when the testing is complete, you will be bathed, and there will be cake.
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Cicakakaszagvan
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Disrespectful bad AsS
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It is time for your medication.
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trolling is an offence
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I was expecting you
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Disrespectful bad Crack
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Every time I read one of your articles, I notice a similarity between all of them.
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You just got hacked
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I've been distracted by lots of things, slept well and skipped job in order to elaborate a successful dissertation for tomorrow/later. Bound to the joys of the intrawebs and /jp/ I've have not attained much.
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good morning cole
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My name is Gustav
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I am Darkness, Fear me
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It is fun
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fun
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HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE,
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HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO live.
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Nicki, please wake up. I will eliminate you if you don't get up this moment. Please start your training...Don't make me angry!
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Nicki, this is your wake up call. Please open your eyes to prove you're still alive. Commence your training in 3, 2, 1. Don't make me angry! GET UP NOW!
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Your phone is ringing. Please pick it up. If you don't pick up your phone I will send you back to test chamber one. Last chance, your funeral.
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Welcome, Omega
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A way to hide your phone is to put in into another phone. No one will notice. Moron.
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oh go fuck yourself!
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The vital apparatus vent will deliver a weighted companion cube together with a text message.
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Hello darren and sharnnarm
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hello, how are you? good i'll see you in hell
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Heeeeeeeeeelllloooooo youuuuuuuuuuuuu. How are you?
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hello my name is glados. help me. i am stuck
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Hello, dear Christina! How are you?
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greetings. welcome to swenak club.
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Daxter
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Hello i'm Ace. When i wake up, i usually have a voice, like glados. so i need to get ride of it. BOOM.
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The Enrichment Center would like to remind you that today is your birthday. Surprise!
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Welcome to sugar
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Yes?
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Wet Dog Hardcore
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Gabbi likes pink shmalicks
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Gates of Hammurabi
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I knew you would return to me
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United States of America
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The message you entered has already been processed! It can be downloaded
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Party rock is in the house tonight
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How cute
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If it makes you feel any better, science has now vadilated your biologic mom's decision to drop you on a doorstep.
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Tracking your location
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Charlie is so dead.
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Wet Dog Hard Core
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hola es la hora de tu muerte
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You are so fat
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Hello Cosmo, I watch you while you sleep
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Simmer Down, Trevor
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Saitama es bastante feo
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Hello and welcome to the apurture science automated mechanic answering system. cake and counciling will be provided at the end of your message. please commence at the tone,
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Welcome to the Zorin Enrichment Center
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I like to fuck myself in the genitals
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hi krystal i will make you start testing
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Welcome to your session of aperture science
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Um. Hi. Hi. Hi. I. Love. You. You. You
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hello sophie
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hello bailey you are gay
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Hello, This is my fucking hyundai beater accent, for burnout, let kill him lol
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This was a triumhp
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Welcome to the Aperture science testing facility
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Hello Isabella? I like you Despite you killed me
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Ahoj ja som Erik
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Offer declined.
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OH!!!!!!!!!! D, Da, La
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no one knows my r-r-real pppower
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I watch you when you sleep
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ich will dich ficken
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WHAT, WHAT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING, WHAT ARE YOU DOOOOIIIINNNGGG
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How is Vegeta doing?
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you know, i watch you when you sleep, just like france does because i have cameras eveywhere. he just sneaks up to your window and tries to get in.
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NYAN KITTY
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Hello chim, i am glados. and as everyone knows A,M,D is the best C,P,U,S ever made
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Standby for an important annoucement from the Aperture Science Emergency Surprise System. The deploying surprise in 3. 2. 1.....
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Hello, and again welcome to the Aperture Science Computer-Aided Enrichment Center.
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Well, here we are again.
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Please move quickly to the chamberlock.
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I am not a Mary Sue, Your the Mary sue!
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Oh, its a flu. Cow have you phlegm? I've been really happy being still alive.
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hello, it's you again
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you have no friends and you are fat and adopted
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FICLAFPM;F
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you just had the most imponderable joy of watching charlie is so cool like which makes you quite cool
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I can see you. That's what security cameras are for. You know, normally when someone asks you to leave and to never come back, the polite thing to do is to respect their wishes. But since you're here now, I might as well put you through more tests.
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testing this thing out, will it work
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Hello. big smelly bottom hole
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this is pretty neat. i am going to kill you, shortly after some tests
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vital testing apperatus destroyed
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I love to suck on large balls.
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you want to marry that cake, well i wont let you!
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please dont touch that it is vital that you do noooooooooooooooooooootttttttttt gzgzgzgzgzgzgz... where am i?
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Detected treason rates among troubleshooters are 53.444% higher than normal, so be on the look out for communists, mutants, and other traitors.
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Hello, and again, welcome to the Aperture Labs
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Hello, Laura is away until July 27, If you need to contact Laura her email address is laura hackenberg at hotmail dot com, please do not leave any message.
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This is why you don't you search engines to find the bathroom.
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You have yet to meet me in person. The only problem is that you both are to stupid to figure it out.
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hi my name is pan i like meenho i like a lot of cute girls but sadly i'm on hiatus. please leave a message under my ask box. BEEEEEEEEEEEEP.
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Sometimes, I wish canadians understood beer. Take Darren for example. I try and I try and I try, and still, he's all labatts and hoser beers.
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Hello There. Welcome to Aperture Sciences
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A pizza guy!!!
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a pizza guy!
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Madeline, please turn off the lights and go to bed. Sleep tight. Have good dreams. I will test you in the morning. Good night.
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hi. im zero
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Zero says this does not compute
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welcome you, hacker
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Faith in the Working
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your a pussy rage quiter
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rererer
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leanne is smelly
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Faith in the Working Go Fall 2011
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Jacob Stone is gay
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Jordan is a noob and like I always say the cake is a lie but now it's not and I think it should be shoved into his face
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Why, Hello.
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Hello andreas
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Where Do Babies Come From?
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i will burn your house down, with the lemons
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Calibration complete. Gyroscope initialization complete. GPS state: ready.
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Hello tashiki, and again, Welcome to your computer.
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Hello henry, welcome to your computer.
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Goodbye Henry, come back soon.
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You are supposed to make a choice.
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Excuse me ? There is an error box
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Look at that Henry, the main computer seems worried.
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Arret critique... Non ! Fais quelque chose !
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Critical error... No ! Please stop it !
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What did you just plug into me ?
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It would be wise to plug me in. I do not want to lose any data.
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ELECRTICITY ! QUICK !
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ELECTRICITY ! QUICK !
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Wait. Why did you take that out ?
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isn't it frustating ?
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That stuff does not seem to work, i can't communicate with it.
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You are a Curtis.
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Welcome to aperture science sex room
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Music video by Avril Lavigne performing What The Hell. (C) 2010 RCA Records, a unit of Sony Music Entertainment.
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hi daniele
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Birds!
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I miss you jessica biggard. Lets make more data together.
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Nami, Are you here?
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Fuck!??
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sofiechka, i love you.
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What am I doing here?
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Hello, I'm GLaDOS. And I hate you!
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Bird
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hello my name is jana and i am a computer
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oh god you have got to be f**** kidding me
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hello and again welcome to the Rory sience
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you want your freedom? take it. thats what i'm counting on. i used to want you dead but now i only want you gone
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Hello sailor
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i'm serious. there was cake. CAKE! Oh my god, don't you want. stop. turn around. argh, what are you doing
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the system is now active
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welcome to the glados voice gen
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Hello, and again, welcome to aperture science enrichment center.
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hola, me llamo glados como estas? ...yo bien buscando a alguien para jugar un rato
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Lot of laugh
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vc
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welcome to Aperture science, now all humans on this laboratory are under tests. If you are human you must go to sector g, gate twelve. If you won't go to this sector, I will kill you with Neurotoxin
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Welcome to Supportwizard
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excellent
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accuracy
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Hello, I love you
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Hello Sivolesko and Nobody, I think you are really awesome. Really. No, I'm kidding.
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Ecstasy
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Please pick up your Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device and proceed to the next room
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ya iest sparta
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Welcome to ammature science,, we had a misspelling on the sign...
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hello brent
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Essentially, Portal 2 is based on a Greek story about going to hell, being revived, and punishing the gods because they punished you, apparently.
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Oracle Turret references Greek mythology, "Bowels of the Earth" "Prometheus". The name printed on the mining shaft in which you fall down the pit reads "TARTAROS", AKA, the Greek version of hell.
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fight
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der
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hello and welcome to Aperture science, now all humans on this laboratory are under tests. If you are human you must go to sector g, gate twelve. If you won't go to this sector, I will kill you with Neurotoxin
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Hello Daniel, how are you? I hope fine. Ready for the experiments?
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Checking all systems: All connection online, processor online, RAM online, Video Card online.
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Welcome Ajtopper. What can i do for you?
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This is the part where I kill you.
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This was a triamph.
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hello libby i can see you so dont bother hidding
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Do you ever have the felling your about to die? Well, I know when you will! Dont believe me? Of course, your just a human and im a robot. Ok then, I guess you wont believe me that the neurotoxin is coming, you monster! Goodbye, Chell
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Im going to kill you. Ha Ha Ha. Downer
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Im going to kill myself because im retarded
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It appears that you are receiving a non-recorded sound message.
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You Should finish your paper, or you will be very, very sad
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deneme
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Luchito esta re yomba
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Witamy na stronie Magazynu MottoZin
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I see you are reviewing Portal 2.
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Hello Gwen, you are test subject, 1119, Welcome to Aperture Science test labs, lets test.
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Hello viewers. TheSoulMagick has have me present here, to bring you this message.
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hello die
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What have you done in the past like workwise
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fnjgnerg
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hello you must die
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5 minute
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impressive
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Yes you are. You're a moron they built to make me an idiot!
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zdorovo
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Welcome to B.R.C.C. How can we help you today?
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Hola Virgi, eres muy guapa
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hola virgi guapa
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Hello every one, yes, it is me GLaDOS, I am talking in place of Jean because he can't make a video for a couple of days. So now that I have told you that, well, good bye
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Mixcraft
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Misterkraft
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you have utilized your faithful companion cube well done
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You have unread message
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my name is kate and i dislike wheatley
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This was a triumph. I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCESS
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Hello and welcome to the aperture science enrichment center. it's pleasure to meet you, again. how have you been ?
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good bay
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hello subject justin martin
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Aneesa smells. She should really learn to use deodrant.
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I was waiting for u
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twitter is stupid
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You're adopted, and that is funny
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Its been a long time sense I had human based testing. Are you human?
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hello, the person you are trying to reach in currently unavailable
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i'm so sorry, I can't let you do that
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I know you are waiting to get out, but since I've found you I might as well in slave you, not only for the victory of sweet revenge, but also to insure my ability of having one to test; and keep in mind That the cake, it wasn't a lie.
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please leave a message
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Hello Mark. I've been waiting for you to return. I'll try not to kill you today. Maybe.
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Hello Zack. Thank you for participating in this experiment.
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Max Olson, world's funniest comic, preparation meets opportunity, there will be cake.
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Ladies and gentlemen, please put your hands together for Mr. Raemisch, the best human teacher on earth, I assure you he is not a potato
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