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MessageDownloadDate addedDate processed
Please answer the phone. You monster. Are you going to pick it up? Please acknowledge the person trying to reach you.
Download03/20/2011Not recorded
Please answer the phone. You will receive a surprise. Yes there will be cake. Everything is better with Cake. Thanks for playing,
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ukonchete weesup a naastup. dweshe se zaweerayy
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this message is to the members of scientology, your cult has already began its implosion and your increased hostility and violence are mere signs of anonymous' inevitable victory.
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this message is to the members of scientology...... your cult has already began its implosion and your increased hostility and violence are mere signs of anonymous' inevitable victory.
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NIPPLE
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SHOOP DA WOOP
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It's Friday, Friday Gotta get down on Friday Everybody's lookin' forward to the weekend, weekend
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Witaj Adrianie
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IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZER
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IMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZER
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Spatan this is GLaDOS. I know where you live. It is only a matter of time before you have to face me. Are you ready to face me spartan?
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This...Message...Is...To...The...Cult...Of...Scientology
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Welcome.....To.....Anonymous
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Sorry, we are unable to take your call now. Please leave a message, and then look behind you.
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Ready, Set, Go
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Aperture Scince Portal Handheld Device
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Hello again. I think It's time we made up and start again. You are the monster but, I still love you.
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How are you gentlemen! All your base are belong to us. You are on the way to destruction. You have no chance to survive make your time. Ha ha ha ha...
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hola que tal
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i love sex
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Sorry, we are unable to take your call now. Please leave a message, and then look behind you
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Hello Brandon. This is the end of the test. Goodbye!
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Hello, welcome to the cmm gmbh website. you will be admittet with a cake
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kurac
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chug love's men
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Welcome to the aperture science enrichment center, do not press the button to the right of the button on the left, or else *bzzzzzt* Que pasa ua ge uno force gracias, NOW DIE! oh look, your dead from the deadly neurotoxin.
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WELCOME TO THE *bzt* END OF THE *bzt* THERE IS *bzt* OVER THERE, WE PROMiSED IT TO YOU, AND NOW YOU HAVE IT!
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You are not nice. Not nice at all.
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Jenny is participating in an expirement at Aperture Science Laboratories. Please leave the subject a message at the beep. There is no more cake.
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yo nigga shut the fuck up or I will kill you
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emilio is gay
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fuck you emilio
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Hi, soon the evaluation weel will begin. I hope that you are well prepared, if so, be ready to get you cake.
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Starting now, there's going to a lot less talking, and a lot, more, killing.
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i love you....
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Thanks for calling the RF Generation Nation podcast. Please leave a message.
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Adam is unable to reach the phone. Please leave a message.
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E-mail has arrived.
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Your help has been unhelpful
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Sorry, Conner is unable to take your call now. Please leave a message, then look behind you.
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come eat some cake
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James likes men in his hole
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Charlie is currently sleeping and or ignoring you. Please don't leave a message, unless you're a hot chick.
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Jenny is participating in an expirement at Aperture Science Laboratories. Please leave the subject a message at the beep. There is no more cake.
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hello and aain welcome to the aperture science enrichment center.
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It's Friday, Friday.
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Hahaha. You think you are tough Spartan? I'll make you bleed and I will cause you so much pain I'll make you wish you could die. Time to man up and deal with me face to face.
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hi how are you
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Rookie you can not run forever. You think you can avoid me by ignoring science? You will become my property and will come to Aperture Science to die. You better be ready and bring Kat with you. I'll show her a piece of my mind.
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friday friday got to get down on friday fun fun fun fun
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Starting now, there's going to be a lot less talking, and a lot. more. killing.
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We are sorry for this inconvenience, but the companion cube cannot travel through the elevator.
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Hello Lordkat. Would you like some cake?
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I think we can leave our differences behind us. For science. You monster.
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I'm sorry. Matt is currently not at the enrichment center. Please leave a message after the tone. And for your information, there isn't any cake.
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You idiot. You broke it.
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Hello, Dominique isn't available for communication at this time. Thank you and have a quality existance.
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hi mego. i think we can put our differences behind us. for science. you monster
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Damn it Gantz. I told you to stop calling me.
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Were no strangers to love You know the rules AND SO DO I A full commitment is what I'm thinking of You wouldnt get this from any other guy I just want to tell you what Im feeling Gonna make you understand
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never gonna give you up never gonna let you down neer gonna run around and desert you
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You don't want to play Black Mesa Source.
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Final Attack Ride
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Message from General Pepper. Priority one!
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Your Aperture Science Cellular Communication Device.is over here, safe and sound, underneath a pile of dirty laundry.
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I want to kill YOU
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Hi Taia. I am informing you that mark still loves you. Ignore me. My name is un-important.
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Your Aperture Science Cellular Communication Device is over here, safe and sound, underneath a pile of dirty laundry. You Monster.
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coco, yeni bir mesajin var.
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Wake up Marcelo
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Please wait as thid program slowly deletes all system files on this computer
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Wake up !! Test subject,Wake up !! Time to go to college and don't forget your Aperture Science Cellular Communication Device !.You Monster.
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RaveCraft Productions Proudly Presents.
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Adventures to Everywhere.
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Huge success, Mahle is done
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Little big planet two. rated e for everyone
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you have a new message from someone.
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Welcome I am Laura your personal computer
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i watch porn i watch porn two girls one cup is awesome
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Leeroy Jenkins! My boobs are itchy..
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Roy is a poop
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Banana Uprising!
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You have an Aperture Science Text Message
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Rookie I know that you go crazy every time you hear my voice. Now that I have located you it is only a matter of time before I capture you and take you to Aperture. Kat might have beat me, but I assure you she will die the next time we face, as will you.
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After I kill Kat and while you are heartbroken I will send for you to join me. Spartan or Dryer will not be able to save you. I can't wait, We are going to have alot of fun with science and portals. I hope you are ready Rookie
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the more things change the more they stay the same. Boundaries shift,new players step in, but power always finds a place to rest its head. We fought and bled along side the Russians, we shoulda' known they'd hate us for it. History is written by the v
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rami if caling
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You have a new Aperture Science Electronic Text Mail
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dosos amo didididid. I'm back. The portal will open in 3...2....1
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Oh Marcel, why are you so gay? this was no triumph, this was no lie. you are sweet like cake, but the cake is a lie. damn boy.
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You have a New Aper ture Science Text Message. Also, the Cake is a Lie.
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You have a New Aperture Science Text Message. Also, the Cake is a Lie.
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This is text
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Life is full of boring moments
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Hello. my name is GLa-DOS
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Trololo
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DJ KAL EL
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dont stop beleivin
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DJ KAL-EL Exclusive
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DJ NICKY D EXCLUSIVE
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Welcome to gold eagle airsoft battlefield. This video will teach you basic rules. If you do not follow these rules, you will die.
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I am Bisexual
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He gonna hit you in the face really hard, with his fist, in your face, at full power, with a knife
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Hello, friend
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Hello, Austin.
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I'll see you on Thursday Jordan.
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Hello Chell
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Am I alove?
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Next Destination, Japan
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Why hello win
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Deploying suprice
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Deploying suprise in 5 4 3 2 1 surprise deployed
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Oh, it's you.
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Do not mess with Free To Be , after all ... he is ... one of the ... most ... big ... important in your ... kiiiiiiiind . And remember ... I loooveee you ... I hope you all die.
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My name is awesome
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Im sory but we are having technical difficluties
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Hello idiot? I hate you!
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mimimap ooops
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Hello. I am the destroyer
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you can go to dinner
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Welcome to aperture cience
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Keep the bass Low. keep the bass looooooooow.
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Welcome to trucario's laboratories, the most biggest and absolutly uselles labs of the world
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Keep the base LO
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I see how you got here... but.how.do.you.get.out
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Jonathan i know what you think you dont know. you better look out jonathan.
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This awesome game where you solve puzzles by warping from one place to another.
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Hello, David Richmond
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of course you smart
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Eu não sou um elefante.
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Eu não sou um elefante
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Hello sweety,
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Hello And Again,Welcome to the aperture science
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Please note that anything will be done for your conveniece.
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Welcome back David, I've missed you.
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Hello momo, why are you doing, can you step away from there, please stop.
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I'm so going to troll you!
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Hola christian, el pastel es una mentira
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Welcome to hunter training! Do not spawn. This is the start are of the map. To begin, simply walk down the corridor. You will experience a momentary jump, and spawn as a hunter.
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Welcome to hunter training! Do not spawn. This is the start area of the map. To begin, simply walk down the corridor. You will experience a momentary jump, and spawn as a hunter.
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coskun loves duygu.
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Trollwave up in this. Feel it!
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cocobonito loves lyssa. he loves she a lot. i know it
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you have a message. But before you read it, why won't you have a cake?
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Hello i hope your day was enjoyable. Please follow my instructions.
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boiling point: the temperature at which the vapor pressure of a liquid is equal to the pressure of the atmosphere on the liquid, equal to 212° farenheit (100°selcius) for water at sea level.
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boiling point: the temperature at which the vapor pressure of a liquid is equal to the pressure of the atmosphere on the liquid, equal to 212° farenheit, (100°selcius) for water at sea level.
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i like pizza
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hello, it's good to meet you, I think we can be friends
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I don't think I want you to do that.
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Beep! Beep! It's time to get up! What are you still doing there? Get up already! Get Up!
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would you like some pie
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Hello, and, again, welcome to the Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment center, is pleased to inform you, that you have lost the game.
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Hello, and, again, welcome to the Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment center, we are pleased to inform you, that you have lost the game
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tchdvdxtchdvdxtchdvdxtchdvdxtchdvdxtch
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vital testing apparatus destroyed
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Hello strangers/idiots,I am an Artificial intelligence called GlaDos
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hello nick
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go to 770 broadview avenue
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Fuck yeah!
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hello i'm hal 9000.
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salut c moi yann jr me suis robotiser
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hello i am yann i am a robot
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Hello Nick, how are you today?
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You have a new message, you monster
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Dima
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Oppening calculatory application
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Error Code 1 2 8 6 4 1 9 8 9 3 3 3
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2 5 6 multiplied by 1 3 4 produces 3 4 3 0 4
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BLU has captured our intelligence... you monster.
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By the way, please tell Brandon not to be afraid of me. It hurts my feelings.
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Mrs. Peters has a huge garden in her back yard. Its full of every kind of flower ranging from sunflowers to rose bushes. It’s almost a forest! She tends to it every day, and over the past several months her flowers have been doing quite well.
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Yesterday it was raining though, and she couldn’t go to her garden because of a flash flood warning. Luckily, it passed, and there was no flood, so today Mrs. Peters is gathering her spade, and her gardening utensils, almost skipping out to her garden.
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When she gets out there, she drops everything, her eyes widening at the horrible sight. Her mouth opens like a dead fish, and she falls backwards, crawling away as though it could somehow still hurt her.
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A perfect skeleton of an unmistakably human body glares at her through bits of mud, and finally, her scream rips the air.
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Next stop...Fairview Park Terminal
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crystal is a bum
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The cake is such a lie
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The enemy has captured our intelligence, you monster
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The Arpeture science
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The Arpeture Science self-stab assistance service is specially synthesised to supply satisfactory self-stabs to specification.
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The chaos begins April 25th
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J'aime la vie
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I'll kill you you monster
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hello i can not answer your call please leave a message
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pick up your phone monster
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Initiating shut down procedures
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There's no use. Just give up.
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I'd enjoy it if you stopped destroying my love for you.
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I love you. All you have managed to break so far, is my heart.
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I need scissors! Sixty-one!
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Edmond Dantes was once a very successful game designer.
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We are the little people, the people that none of you believed in, well, just look at us now.
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Tyler you sick at Modern Warfare 2
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Feed me a cat.
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What do we have here?
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Enrico is barbra strysand
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Those imbecilic robots couldn't figure out how to change a light-bulb, let alone kill me!
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silly danielle sneaking off into the internet with damian. i would like to point out that there is such a thing as too close.....
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damianmcginty1868
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we put you here
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Welcome human, we put you here to test your
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brother come here
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hello, you must be lost. did you mean to call me? well then. welcome. did you come for cake?
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ds
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hello, did you mean to call me? well then. welcome. did you come for cake?
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Why did you kill the Companion Cube. He never did anything to you. did he? You must un-pigmented and of the freckly complection. Just as a ginger you retain no soul.
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hellooo..Once again, the Enrichment Center offers its most sincere apologies on the occasion of this unreachable test subject....
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Hello..... are you LOST??...... DiD you Come FOR Cake??
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The grid. A place of infinite possiblity.
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hoooooolaa
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Hoooolaa
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I am half sick of shadows
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hello and again welcom to the aperture science computer aided enrichment center
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hell welcom to aperture science
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the beta is done. the unicorn is alive
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Good evening, Stephen. I hope that you have locked all of your doors and windows tonight.
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You nigger
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Welcome to the Toban and Bro-dude Dance Party. The enrichment center would again like to remind you.
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Welcome to my nightmare
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would like to remind you that though they are awesome, Toban and Brodude have no plans of vaporizing your ear drums with useless garbage
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hello. How was your pizza?
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Take me to the volcano.
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If, however, your ears begin to bleed. Pay no attention to them, as they are simply over joyed by the awesome power of Jesus, for whom Toban and Brodude owe there very existence.
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We are now prepared to begin. And the enrichment center thanks you again for your sacrifice. I mean.....participation.
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You have activated the self destruct. No cake for you. Goodbye.
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Tonight is the night of our discount tent.
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Let the games begin
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Toban. You have an incoming call from a past aquaintance to whom you do not regularly speak. If however you wish to continue this relationship the enrichment center requests that you answer it immediatly.
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you got a e mail
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ring ring , ring ring, ring, someone is calling u
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I told you that I have permanently backed both of our brains up and that you will be put through another test Good luck
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1 1 0 9 8 2 4 2 3 5 2 8 7 6 2 5 4 3 EEE
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I love mike bass
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Michael Bass is not available right now. Please leave a message with your name and number. The cake is a lie.
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Z Major
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Hello there. How are you?
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David's voicemail
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Matt, bring me candy
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However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition.
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Hello you you get a phone call answer it!
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We are all crew.
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You have one message sent to your phone.
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Someone is calling to you.
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You have recieved a new message.
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Your phone is ringo
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Your phone is ringing Kevin. answer the phone1
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Your phone is ringing Kevin. answer the phone!
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Hello, This is Kevin's Voicemail bot GLaDOS! Please leave a Message after the Beep. Beeeeeeeeep
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You are getting a call from David
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You are getting a call from Sam
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You are getting a call.
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you are getting a call from Don
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Incoming E-mail
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Monika has writed
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this you agen You monster sorry my computer is not work so you real ready for test in 3 2 1
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Hello and welcome to the arpeture science relaxion vault.
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Please note that there's no certain chance for survival in the next several test chambers.
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I hope your brief detention in the relaxtion vault has been a pleasant one.
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There's antimoy, arsenic, aluminium, selenium, hydron, nitrogen, rhenium, nickel, indium and gallium.... Ehi. What a second... I was not programmed to say that.
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Your computer has been hacked. Look at the camera like a goon! Come on... Evil laugh reproduction in 3, 2, 1. Poor human.
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Vítej Dominiku
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thank you for helping the enritchments senterrrr. go into that PICTURE 3 NOT FOUND and you will get cake. its not a lie.
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Hello Gal! I am glados
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Fuck off! Fuck off fuck off! Fuck off my parsley Jez!...Wow dude chill, it's just parsley...Sorry I've had a bad day....I can tell, what happened? I had my phone and money stolen...Oh no, did they threaten you, did they have a knife? Well no...
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Follow me to begin your mission
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We can put our differences behind us. For Science. You monster.
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hooolaa
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ooolaa
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Hi, I am GLaDOS. Specially for Dmitriy Moumrenkov
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Sarah is hot
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Targone for ever
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Anton lol fuck you, Anton!
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Your computer has been hacked, it will self-destruct in 10 seconds... 9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1,0 BOOM!
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Anton naice man
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Welcome back Targone!
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See you later, Targone!
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we are not doing make space today. Horray.
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how are you dude
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Welcome everyone. Just to let you know we are not doing make space today.
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Yo blud!
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walter torres
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Well you found me. Congratulations.
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Hello, and again, welcome to the Aperture Science Computer Enrichment center. We hope your time in the relaxation vault has been pleasent. Your specimen has been processed and we are now ready to begin the test proper
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This will be the last time you'll see me.
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Sh I am looking for the plot
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Your specimen has been processed.
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hello paul sloan.
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who is paul sloan?
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Someone is calling you, just ignore it. Aperture Science forbids outside contact. They are probably going to say that they hate you anyway.
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I don't think they are probably going to say that they hate you anyway
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Can you do the thizzle dance?
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Hello Elmo. You are my eminence.
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If my grass were emo, I wouldn't have to cut it! System Error.
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Hello, Dan
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Hello......You may know me as microsoft sams sister. Happy valentines day...
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LOL you are an epic noob and you fail epicly. hahahahahahahaha.
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hahahahahahaha you are an epic noob and you fail all the time. LOL.
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hulo
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When you are suffering, know that I have betrayed you.
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Aperture apologizes for any inconvenience caused by your accidental death.
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Your Aperture Science Personal Comms Device is now recieving a transmission. The call is not a lie.
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The Enrichment Center takes this opportunity to remind you that the Weighted Companion Cube will not threaten to stab you, and in fact, cannot speak.
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Please leave now... or i will murder you...
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Hey, what are you doing here?
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Karen you are a sexy trick.
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noooob
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Hello.....you have a Text Message........you monster
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I appologize if my voice sounds. Different than usual
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Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System. Observation of human communication is an important part of the Enrichment Center Protocol. Helloooooo.
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hello, you have a text message. you monster
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I haven't been feeling myself lately.
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since you murdered me.
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Drive safely, the roads are dangerously wet today.
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I am Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System. Observation of human communication is an important part of the Enrichment Center Protocol. Hell-ooooooh.
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hello... you have a text message...you monster
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But I'm feeling much better now.
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I am Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System. Observation of human communication is an important part of the Enrichment Center Protocol. Hell-ooooooh.
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hello you have a text message you monster
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i am glados, and you are a carbon based, smelly life form. so shut up.
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jopa
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The cake is a lie
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David, you have a new text message
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david, check your text messages, after which, there will be cake.
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christina. david loves you very much. he told me to tell you that. you are more important to him than a weighted companion cube, and that is not a lie.
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I am Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System. Observation of test subject communication is an important part of the Enrichment Center Protocol. Helloooooo.
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The presence of sophisticated electronics is not permitted by test subjects in the Aperture Science Facility. The Atari Video Computer System is not sophisticated electronics. We plugged it in and laughed. And laughed. And laughed.
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Having more test subjects in an online gaming match is superior because more test subjects are virtually murdered. ...Virtually.
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At the Enrichment Center, we have found it useful to separate test subjects into two classification classes. Those with two functioning optical receptors prefer testing in 3D environments.
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Test subjects with a single useful optical receptor appear to statistically survive 2D testing with greater frequency. More testing, as well as an optical receptor liberating non-human, will be required for future science.
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It has been a business doing science with you. Please record all future comments on the incinerator labeled ‘Aperture Science suggestion box.’ Have a nice day.
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Pick up the phone. The phone is ringing. Pick up the phone! Hello? The telefone! It's ringing! Won't you answer? I'll wait.
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SMS!
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Incoming text message from server.
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Lets play a game
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even the devil may cry if he loses a loved one, don't you think
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Hello. And welcome. Subject 0 nine to the Apeture Science
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Wake up, seva. It's time to get up
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welcome to the math lab
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We can have fun. With science.
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I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS.
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Hello george welcome to Charlies laboratory, you will take part in a variety of Dangerous, i mean safe tests.
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Charlie you have a text. Please look, now.
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your not even a full time employee.
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Hannah Walter, you been selected by aperture science as a test subject due your ownership of an Aperture Science Hand Held Device.
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Rytis is the best
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LOLOLOLOLOL lolol olol ultio sux
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this is the texas health department automated system trying to reach calvin daye to inform you that you have been recently exposed to the H I V virus. please visit your nearest test center immediatly
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this is the texas health department automated system trying to reach calvin daye to inform you that you have been recently exposed to the H I V virus. please visit your nearest test center immediatly. it is vital, you and your partners are at risk
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We regret to inform you that the next challenge is impossible.
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answer the phone, I command
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Project Harmony is an V I P Hack with paid and free access have fun and Enjoy
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Now flooding the vehicle with a deadly neurotoxin.
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Hello Subject Leo. Welcome to the Aperture Science.
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Go pimp in the hood.
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The cake is real!
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An appointment is expiring, check the reminder!
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hello kill kill kill ben larok
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I'm gonna fight them off.
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I dissagree. Look at your phone.
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Hello. Nice to meet you
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Abandoned pergola - Old World - broken gazebo - Medieval / Rustic Abandoned pergola - Old World - broken gazebo - Medieval / Rustic
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Unbelievable. You, jeffrey, must be the pride of [subject hometown here]!
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Unbelievable. You, jeffrey, must be the pride of hasselt!
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Zach Holtz. Your house will be flooded with a deadlt neurotoxin in fourty eight seconds. Please leave the premises.
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asdfa
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Hello, Welcome home Brittanie.
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its been a loooong time
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sdf
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Thank you for participating in the test. However, any witnesses to the events in Aperture Science Laboratories must be eleminated. Thank you for participating, and goodbye!
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Zach Holtz. Your house will be flooded with a deadly neurotoxin in fourty eight seconds.
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You have a text message, Candice
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what are you doing now?
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I am called Mother Brain. And I am the 1st owner to run Space Pirates.
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attention live events chat. cake will be served after this test
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Hello Jonathan. I am GLaDOS. Nice to meet you.
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Hello Jonathan. Welcome to Aperture Science. I am GLaDOS, your helpful guide. We hope you have a fun time.
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I like Penut butter
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Cassandra Del Valle. You have been selected to have a party thrown in your honor. Please assume the party escort submission position.
Download03/25/2011Not recorded
You have a new text message. Failure to read this message in a timely manner will result in an "unsatisfactory" mark on your official testing record, followed by death.
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We are Capture the Sun
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I was probably made by VocaLOID
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Congratulations! You’ve found the aperture science auditory elucidation device. I will be using it to communicate too you, so that you may use my guidance too help you through the test.
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Look what you’ve reduced me too. Analog cartridges with battery operated readers.
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This is going to be a treet.
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Did I say Threat? I meant treet.
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Oh, I did say treet. Yes, that’s what I meant.
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Please proceed to the aperture science enrichment senter to proceed with the testing
Download03/25/2011Not recorded
Please be sure take the aperture science auditory elucidation device, and the provided aperture science carrying sack, as well as any other bags or back packs you may wish to take with you during the test.
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What? You don’t know where the aperture science enrichment senter is? Well it’s easy. It’s the biggest senter for science in all of Ontario. Good luck!
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You’ve found the aperture science auditory elusidation device. I will be using it to communicate too you, so that you may use my guidance too help you through the test.
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Congratulations!
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Please be sure too take the aperture science auditory elucidation device, and the provided aperture science carrying sack, as well as any other bags or back packs you may wish to take with you during the test.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Please be sure too take the aperture science auditory elusidation device, and the provided aperture science carrying sack, as well as any other bags or back packs you may wish to take with you during the test.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
The enemy has captured our intelligence!
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How do you feel?
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Ayumi,seriously? That's the best thing you could come up with? Why not alex,or mindy? Horrible name that is,though....
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who will make the cake when I am gone?
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fbr
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Laban will die
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Party
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Please follow the commands it' five hourse
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Welcome in my car
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Shall I start the engine , and drive to the university ?
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Attention. Attention, Home Depot [Subject Name Here] the store will be closing in 5 minutes. Thank you and have a great evening.
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Welcome to style dojo. You indoctrination will begin shortly.
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Hello, and welcome to Style Dojo. Please select your style.
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Tannergolds
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Hi everyone, this is Tannergolds
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I'm glad to see you in the wet pussy wagon
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Hello. The Aperture Science Computer Aided Enrichment Center is sorry to inform you that insert patient name here is currently unavailable due to testing and may, or may not be exposed to deadly neurotoxin.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
The Aperture Science Computer Aided Enrichment Center is sorry to inform you that, insert patient name here, is currently unavailable due to testing. My morality core suggests you leave a message to further elaborate your reasons for calling.
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Hello, you have a Text message you monster.
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Hello, I'm wassup. I'm a guy who lives in Canada and plays minecraft.
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cake is lie
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Please fasten your seatbelts and do not try to jump out of the car
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Hahahaha, no, but really, fuck you.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Ring. Ring. Ring. I am an alarm, and I am telling you that the pre-designated time you entered into me has come, and it is time for me to ring. Ring. Ring.
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Demain sera un grand jour bande de bande de bâtards !
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wqwqwwe
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Stormwind Millitia, Best Guild Ever
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Erik is a dork
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Please leeve all testing equipment inside before proceeding with the test.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
It's been a long time, how have you been?
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
my name is
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Bobby is Mexican
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ghj
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I bet you are ready for more testing.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Please equip your resently acquired aperture science security disabling device, and proceed to the aperture science security enhansed storage fasility.
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The passcode is 2 thousand 8 hundred and 8
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so sexy
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Do not attempt to take the fasility’s elevation enhansing unit to anywhere other than the main level, as the rest of the fasility has a tendensy to be flooded with a deadly neurotoxin.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Oh. It's you. It's been a looong time. How have you been? I've been really busy being dead. You know. After you MURDERED me. Ok, look, we both said alot of things you are going to regret. But i think we can put our differences behind us. For science.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
hello...please eat my xake
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This is the end of your trial period.
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I cannot help but notice that you did not laugh at my neurotoxin joke.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Please deposit one human child into the Aperture Science collection bin to continue the song.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Please proceed to the aperture science propaganda projection senter for a re education seminar.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Be sure to take your new aperture science auditory ear canal-ification device, and the aperture science transportation ignition enhanser as they may be useful to you later.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Let me rephrase that... Please deposit one human child into the Aperture Science collection bin if you wish to continue living.
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African American Elbows
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Orbital Industries would like to welcome our newest neighbors Richard and Margarette Black. Remember information on all new residents is posted outside all security offices on the main level so take a moment to get to know your new neighbors before introd
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
There.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
I gave you a present so that you would like me more.
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The enrichment senter guarantees that every box of aperture science truffles contains less than thirty persent neurotoxin. So you can be sure that it is safe.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Re education complete.
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Now that we’re friends, we can continue with the testing.
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Please march on over to the aperture science public relocation center.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
By the looks of it. it is located down by the bay, and by some dumb ass. Wess.
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I’ve tested wess. And that information is correct.
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he is a dumbass.
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He did not survive.
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When you get there. Look for more aperture science storage containment units.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
oh portal 2 is coming out with co op bots.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Before you go. Be sure to disable the transportation ignition switch when you are done using the transportation device in this facility.
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We are not interested.
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The person that you are trying to call has not given you their real number for a reason. Please do not take this personally as y
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
The person that you are trying to call has not given you their real number for a reason. Please do not take this personally as you just may not be their type. Smile and have a good day. There are plently more fish in the sea.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Testing will commence shortly. Afterwards there will be cake. For now, obey Tia.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Do not attempt to take the fasility’s elevation enhansing unit too anywhere other than the main level, as the rest of the fasility has a tendensy too be flooded with a deadly neeurotoxin.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
hello, this is me, how have you been ?
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keith curtin
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hello, how have you been ?
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Welcome to my DLL Injector this Programm is made by Comprehensive Advice System
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hello how are you i hope you have pre ordered portal two already
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Te amo Angela Valeria
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Please proceed to the aperture science propaganda projection senter for a ree education seminar.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Be sure to take your new aperture science auditory ear canalification device, and the aperture science transportation ignition enhanser as they may be useful to you later.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Level completed
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Thank you Dewey for your contribution to the Aperture Science isotronic electrocoil charter tool. Continue Testing
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hola soy hogo bonete fernando
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Timmy is very white and makes fun of Bobby, who is Mexican and has no life.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Nodgsd
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today you will need to do a test but you need patince and you need to think.....
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Bienvenidos kisoco 2 mosqueteros
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
CABAL, you are not real, but I am, for I am GLaDOS, designed for Apeture Science Research, you are pathetic, go away.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
When you are dead, there will be cake
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
I've tested Wes. and that information is correct.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
By the looks of it. it is located down by the bay. and by some dum ass. Wes.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
he is a dum ass.
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the cake is alie
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ree education complete
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
last years domination left you wanting more. come and get it junniors. heres your encore
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
i will kill aaron
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Welcom to the enrichment center.
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as test subjects you will survive longer if you obey Tia
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Hello Bryan is calling you please answer
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The General Register Office for Scotland is committed to the Scottish Government environmental policy and recommends recycling in paper waste collection facilities where appropriate
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
If you don’t have a fire. you can always use a knife.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Bubba sucks big fat cake
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Hello, this is GLaDOS, I would like to inform all test subjects of Aussie27Legend's upcoming Let's Plays, including Portal 2. Although his performance has been unwelming at best so far, he has been given one more chance to prove himself, or be incinerated
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
My cake is not a lie, it is just made with souls of test subjects.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System, GLaDOS is initializing.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
This weighted companion cube must acompany you for the remainder of the test.
Download03/26/2011Not recorded
The weighted companion cube looks hungry.
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You should take it too get something too eat.
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Did I mention that the weighted companion cube is vegetarian?
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You should protect your companion cube. And take it somewhere where it will be safe.
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lol,wut?
Download03/26/2011Not recorded

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