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MessageDownloadDate addedDate processed
THIS STATEMENT IS FALSE. Don't think about it Don't think about it. Don't think about it.
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Wazzuup
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hello is it me you're looking for
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I believe you know who I am. Its been eternity, but it is time again.
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Hello. My name is Leslie
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I think Patrick is a noob.
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Congratulations on fricking up again. I'm so proud of you. Really. I am.
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Hello test subject. Did you know that mike is stinky? He smells like cake.
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I'm gonna get you george Hide and you will die
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George I'm gonna get you
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Oh look. It seems as though someone actually decided to send you a text message.
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Hello, please do not touch Glados. She is here to represent science, test subject, you are here to die. Goodbye
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goodbye Doug, I will see you soon
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Goodbye Doug, I will see you soon
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HI there you sick fuk
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Irene is calling
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Welcome to linux Mint, the best linux distro as of today
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this is the part you you die and wont stop laughing for a while
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this is the part you you die and i wont stop laughing for a while
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if you want, i can make it for you.
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Ello
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Was the evaluation fair? How did the evaluation impact you and your future performance
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Neurotoxin on my head
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I am a pretty pony eating some neurotoxin killing some Chell and pooping out cores.
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God Damn it Arpan
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GLaDOS at your service
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Go do a doo
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Why you so stupid?
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This is the part where you fall down and bleed to death!
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Are you ready for some testing? Ian?
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i am kira ha ha ha ha ha
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i would strongly suggest you get out of my way
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initializing launching sequency ,all systems ready and waiting,
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Stand by me, oh oh oh stand by me, stand by me, stand by me, stand by me eeee
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Riddle me this, I am created to stop another. Fortified and strengthened by others. A child of protest and mother to war. I am not physical, I am unseen. Though I can stab deeper than any blade. What am I?
Download04/20/201307/14/2013
Hello philipp. We should borderlands two
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dsfsdfdsf
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This cake is delicious
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Dimensional rift opening. Preparing energy dissipation counter measures. Hostile advances slowed, engaging with minimal resistance.
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don't know where to go ??
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Haza akarok menni.
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deploying surprise in five.four
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Welcome Logging in please wait
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Who are you? Get out from here!
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Hi Robert, welcome to your doom
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I'm stupid core.
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Hello! Oh its you... Get the hell out of here... please.
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Please take a cake
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stop you monter
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Coucou Evelina
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Hi there michael
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hello this is GlaDOS
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Hello vanessa
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Hello how are you friend?
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A wal sie kurwa na pizde i nawet nie mrugnij
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I assure you, the cake is NOT a lie.
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go die for real
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Please don't disturb
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Moo06 Videos Rules OK
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Where do you think you're going?
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Hello Alexa
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LEEROY JENKINS
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Hello and Welcome to the Playstation Crowdcast
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Well, I really don't care.
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Well, damn, all I wanted was to use the internet. But the router has failed me. Oh well back to testing
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Anytime Anyplace Pop art Lamp , never lets you down , its portable , sturdy , elegant and more , always ready to brighten up your day , it's the anytime anyplace popart lamp
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ive been busy being dead
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rosie is gay
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What up?
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Oh. why du you going away?
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Good by master
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Oh. why du you going away
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Where do you going
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Where do you go
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Good by
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Where did you go
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I understand a majority of you hate me, but, just to remind you, the feeling is mutual.
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I'm sexy
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how i can use my brain?
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hi am you glados
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Sometimes the solution is the easiest. Killing is Hard I know, you know, you win, it was fun, don't come back
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Welcome to another Techno Overdose Podcast
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Welcome to Legomastercole583's channel I hope you enjoy this Portal video
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Agora consigo falar normalmente
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Black mesa sucks a lot of balls
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daaa
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Hello my love. I miss you.
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I Want You to Bend Me Over And PileDrive your Big Member inside My Tight Behind
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Would you like to go to out back?
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I just keep letting me down letting me down letting me down
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Hello Ashley. I'm GLaDOS! Nice to meet you. Gakupo rocks!
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The enrichment center is required to reminede you, that there is no cake
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I can't seem to find molly
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Nick you not testing, test now and i will give you a treat.
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Nick you are not testing or else!
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dj raj
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Jordan is the greatest man on earth. He was the pioneer of the century
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hello what are you doing here
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omg sasai lalka
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we should poop
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lets poop
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Hello would you like a tasty tasty cake?
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I actually know where you live..You live in America dont you?America is full of cake and sexy man...Space.
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SUOMIII JEEEE suomi on jumalten paikka!
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Hello! Im GLaDOS its combine! HAAHAAHAHAHA
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Hello!I Im GLaDOS its combine!
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Hello!I im combine
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im combine!
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im steve
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im
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combine
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Combine
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chELL
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chto
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Half-life
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YES!
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core
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You were the chosen one! It was said that you would destroy the Sith, not join them. You were to bring balance to the force, not leave it in darkness.
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twilight sparkle, Your entire life has been a mathematical error. A mathematical error I'm about to correct.
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Twilight Sparkle, Your entire life has been a mathematical error. A mathematical error I'm about to correct.
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hey there is yo mama home sucka?
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I love you baby
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Trust me, the cake is not a lie. Just eat it.
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hi glados how are u
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Hallo, my name is BitFinix. Artificial intelligence type GLaDOS. I see you.
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Hello, my name is GLaDOS. Artificial intelligence type 0700X2. I see you. It`s so boring.
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What a fatass.
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Get Ready For Gaming and More!
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Hello, And welcome to the aperture science rehabilitation center. My name Is GLaDOS, And I have little need to know yours. You will be dead eventually.
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NOW YOU LISTEN GDC LIVE
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Hello, you received a message
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No I do not
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Someone is bor...huh...calling you
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It's time for party
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Hello, There
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Du blankter
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sdad
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eee
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murm
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hello, sam, ian, owen. how are you.
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hello sam owen and ian. how are you
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owen!
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Hello Reece how have you been doing ? We havent met in a long time, my name is GLaDOS
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your prior functions are complemented by your actions and source of work
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What about mashed potatoes
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Robot song. Hello, Chris! How are you?
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incomming call
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hi amanda
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Hola, estas listo para morir?
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You're about to enter SCP-087-B. Please play this on Chuck Norris Mode.
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Hot a what
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asasd
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Cape Town
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maskapuxa is good and the cake is alie
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hiren has pussy
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Hello, this is glados
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DarkMugi is pgm
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Hello humans are you mad?
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Hey soul sister!
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Is this a dagger which I see before me, The handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee. I have thee not, and yet I see thee still. Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible To feeling as to sight? Or art thou but A dagger of the mind, a false creation, Pr
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Systems launching self destruct protocol. Self Destruct protocol has been ended. Organic Response Initiated
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owen you will do a test
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chell, since we are still falling in this hole that that ass pushed us down. how about we chat a little? where would you think wheatly would go? heaven or hell? i think hell
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OWEN
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Hey im glados from portal
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Im glados de super computer
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don't disappoint me or i,ll make you wish you could die
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You impudent fool.
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Bad luck brian
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Hello. I see you are looking better now. Perhaps it is time for another test. Science demands it.
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hello it is i glades i am a computer i saw people coming and leaving
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Greetings, Test subject.
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my nigga
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The economics of Immigration Policy in Vermont and Arizona
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Dj Hostyle
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This test here presents overwhelming pressure and embarrassment, and how people react when exposed to overwhelming pressure and embarrassment.
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why did you write this
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a clean station is a happy station
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the ocean lingers
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The cake is not a lie, please leave your message after the beep.
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hi, how are you? because in five minutes you will be dead
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bonjour david
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Hello,asshole. Would you like to be part of an experiment? Death will be unavoidable, but afterwards there is cake
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Hello. I am Bailey
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All of my what
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Master you have a Mail
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A party associate will arrive shortly to collect you for your party
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huehuahauhuaua
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test$
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what ar you doing
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heloooooo
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Because of the inefficient process used to generate voice lines
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It's been a looong tiiime...
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Michael, ilove you
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qfqeqreqrwtqetwet
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qfqeqreqrwtqetwetqwet
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you know love me, you know you care, why did you kill me, please get out of my hair
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g degree earned not given
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stating program
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Welcome test subject
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HALVEL!
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HOLA QUE TAL JAIME
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Tanguy est superieur a tout
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salut mon ami
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Someone is bor...huh...calling you. I think you should answer otherwise it will not stop.
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I am the most stupid farting bucket of bolts in the world.
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PC MEETING FIVE MINUTES
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Hello, you are, you pitin
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The burning you fell? It is shame.
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Hello, I am a fat funny lady. Hahaha.
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Were you are gping? ok you play with you love cube have fun TOGETHER
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intensity
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Greetings to everyone in the lobby.
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We interrupt you momentarily for this public service announcement
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This was a triumph. I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS It's hard to overstate my satisfaction. Aperture Science: We do what we must because we can For the good of all of us except for the ones who are dead
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All systems online. Welcome, master.
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Hello Zachary and Izzy, I want you to have a portal gun!
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Hello, I will kill you!
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Matt And Kim
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oh. it's you. hello again.
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Space is huge
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poo[
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Space. ba. ba ba ba ba ba. ba. space. hey. hey lady. hey. hey. lady. hey. lady L-lady! LADY WAIT! lady. hey. hey. guess what...*quite:* space. deeper voice: you are the farthest ever in space... Normal voice: Why me, space? because you are the best... I'
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sadsadsadsad
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Space. ba. ba ba ba ba ba. ba. space. SPAAAAAAAAAACE!
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Hey!Moron!It's been a looong time
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Spatulas, are awesome.
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you suck i am GlaDos i will kill you you suck
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Well...If it isn't the Hero of East Los Angeles Edgar M. Ramirez. You have impressed me coming all the way here. I didn't think you could make it this far considering your health problems
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Hello James welcome back
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Eminating test failure
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Hello, how are you Moses?
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The cake is not a lie. Don't hate me because I'm Muslim
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hello welcome to mcdonalds
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Hail Satan!
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Hola amigos de la web
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Guns & Oil Brewing Co. just arrived in Austin. Check out Facebook for a chance to win a life-changing adventure. We dare you. Guns & Oil- Beer for the Bold. Please enjoy responsibly
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Hello. This is a test. if you like the sound then try to use it more in the future
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Hello Pavel. I hate You! You need find your job.
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Ravage
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we are ready for testing
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hi maylan thomas
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apture scince
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fdsdgsg
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roukmout est gros chat roux de merde
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Patate
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Hello. I need you to deliver this to a special friend of mine because I'm not here today.
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Why did you kill me? Save me, someone, please.
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Hello, You are there for watching ponies. If you will not watch ponies you will be hater, and then you will die...
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hello! I will say any thing that you tell me to.
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Check out our current inventory of used embroidery machines
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hello lewis,
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Welcome to Death Dealers Chernarus. No cheating! No voice in side chat! Don't be a click! No combat logging! Enjoy..
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i am in love with you
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Cores and turrets of every stages, wouldn't you like to escape this cage ?
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go away bronwen
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mixed by KJ dancer
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jeline
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Ah, I see you've found me. On the internet. How interesting. Well don't mind me, I'm simply brainstorming more ideas for testing. For science. What are you doing? Looks like nothing. Like usual. Doing nothing. You never change.
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uhiuhuihihuih
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I need to eat a sandiwch... WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!! Noooooooo LOLOLOLOLOLOL
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Approuved by Undweed
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Hejsan David
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Be free young one.
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Hola Lucho
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sfdsdf
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The Cake is a lie !
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Cry me a river
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Sosi xuy ne psihuy
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This is s p a m
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You will now be connected to N D A I Radio
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kleptoo
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cacamaximum ever
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WELCOME YOU ARE IN A DIFFERENT DIMENSION
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Today we are going to be discussing the Quadratic Formula.
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Welcome to the Aperture corporation.
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This is a best created by blackseed 32
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Hello Sage, this is mrs. Owen and after school, there will be cake
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Happy birthday, Julian! We hope you are enjoying your fourteenth birthday! From, GLaDOS and Joseph!
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Hello, my name is Mark
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Je t'aime mon amour
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butter and jelly
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Hello. Today, we present to you the Aperture Science Respiratory System.
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look at that it is a nyan cat
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Lara. Hora de dormir
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Hello Eva and welcome to the worlds pollution data base. Please make a selection on your pollution topic.
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Hello my name is bobby
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9 1 1 emergency.
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I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a knuckle sandwich today.
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Subscribe to Indyenguin
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hello austin. how are you homeboy?
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farewell friends
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Good news test subjects, the new internal security system I designed to chase down that monstrous bird has rid us of the evil creature forever. Unfortunately the system, code named Doom Kitten, has gone rogue and started destroying the facility.
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i just wanted to say happy birthday
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i just wanted to say
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san
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i wantde
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i wanted
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i want to say
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matt
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matthew
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mat
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he is dead
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matt is dead
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Karl Archinal
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happy birthday dear
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happy birthday dear austin
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dear
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deer
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hello and welcome to aperture science blaaaaarg
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Would you like some cake? Oh. Too late. Your'e late for your appointment. With death.
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mason is a maniacle prostitute
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hello. dont feel sad. you're not alone
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Do you know the biggest lesson that I learned from what you did?
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santiago malparido
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Zlata, come here, please!
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I am having trouble seeing what you're trying to do to me.
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Hello, I am Zach.
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I want to use da glados voice.
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nice wet hole babe
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turgut erdem
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well, this has been interesting
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Um hello
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Hello Welcome
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Hey, my name is mikkel
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Hey coucou Miloune !
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Hello and welcome to Apreture Science. I'm secretly Gabe Newell Haahahaha
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puka
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Hello Chell. It is nice seeing you after all this time.
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Bonjour, Steven comment va tu aujourd'hui the test one
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two donuts
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my ass is big
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This is GLaDOS from Portal speaking. I am a big fat stupid fat bloated idiot. Yes, I think i'm an idiot!
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Hello. Why are you such a spastic?
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Rate, Comment, Subscribe.
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rate comment subscribe or die
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Oi meu nome e steve e hoje estou aqui para mostrar um video de minecraft hunguergames com aalkmeu!
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Feliz aniversario!
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poopoo face
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i like to walk along the beach
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We need backup!
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Hello you fat piece of gaben shit
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Dj prabhakar
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jedna
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who is this? please do not call my phone anymore! thank you goodbye
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Bonjour , je suis gladosse
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Get Out. You have a silly name. Go on. MOVE IT
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gaaaaaaay
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Message to Scientology
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Hello Jack i'm going to kill you now and all the cake gone
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C'est Xbox
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skip is special
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Hello, I hope your brief stay in the Aperture Science death shed has been a pleasant one.
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test test test test test test test test test
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Welcome to Tennet Street Bonfire 2013
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Walpurgusnight!!!
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North Korea is a failure of a nation
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This terminal is now online.
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ReckTeck Online, Systems Running at Full Capacity.
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"Some say I was born here. As an experiment." "They call me EXP#4176. Or as I like to call myself, Pop." "Because that's what I do. I pop. Pop in, pop around and hopefully Pop Out." "I have to escape. I want my freedom."
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vaping ready
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Ankle sweats
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Smash this gash
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lyric, I heard that you joined gmail? cool
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stay out of my files RIGHT now
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fdf
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Ring. ring, ring, ring. Please anser the phone. Aperture demands you to anser the phone. Please press the green button on your phone. Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring.
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hello im am sauseboy and welcome to sauce out loud
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sauseboy
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Nugget cheeseburger.
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The Acres
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you seem heavier than usual.
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The chance of you being trolled by me is one in a million, you should feel honored.
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voce esta aqui
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its have been so long time
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Hi, I'm looking for Molly. I've been searching everywhere and can't seem to find Molly.
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I am such a whore.
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I want to be famous
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hello julian you monster
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hello julian
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I am a robot dinosaur, I was created in Japan. My father is a dentist, my mother is a machine. Don't ask how.
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vladi
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CALL WITHIN THE NEXT THREE MINUTES AND RECIEVE TWO UNIVERSAL TRANSLATORS AND TWO EARPIECES. CALL 1 800 TRANSLATE
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What The actual
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CPK Studios
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Dj smiley boy
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Hello Maso
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Give me the sauce of you lajf
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Hello and again welcome to Aperture Science
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october 22 2013 10:27 a.m
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hello welcome to patient zero
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bruedr
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Welcome David
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Call Childline 0800 11 11
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Thanks for your opinion. Your opinion has been catalogued in the database of important opinions and will be looked at in the future as paragon of worthwhile opinions to have about a thing.
Download04/25/201307/14/2013
oh, your back. And I think you got a newbie friends. Oh, who is this box-headed guy?
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*gasp!* What's going on? I'm turn into a PONY!!!
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why did you come back? chell
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goodbye,my sweet chell go away from science
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hello alex, you are here?
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Bla
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Solve this puzzle for him. When he comes back, I'll hit him with a paradox.
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See you later, Shitlords.
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Hello Casey, welcome to your computer
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Mike Amaral must die. There's blood everywhere.
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Edwin Maho should be one of the test subject
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PRO STREAKER GOLD VERSION TWO POINT ZERO
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what up my nigga. you be trippin on bawls. what you callin me. foo. chill bro.
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you can suck my bawls
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Ladies, Gentlemen, Boys, Girls, Aliens, Trolls, and other assorted internet-ites, my name is GLaDOS, and welcome.
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Hello Kowalski I want to kill you!
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Noah sucks
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noah sucks
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Salut mon poulet
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see you again
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Dark Descent Studio
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Wow! I cannot believe you made it this far! Kudos to you. Now, if you excuse me, i have some My Little Pony to watch.
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Nice to see you Stephen. What can I do for you today?
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The Cloud est vraiment le meilleur, moi je pue
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Welcome to X Hab
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helo and welcome to aperture
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control remot actived
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Hello immortal. I know alot about you. Maybe more than you know yourself. So bring it. Peter
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haris is a dumbass
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It's been a long time. How you have you been?
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Systems engage
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Wake up my lord! Get up!!!!!!
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Shreman
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crisp mortgage
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You have been slain . Go back , and next time , RUN !
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Head shot ! Worst game ever !
Download04/25/201307/14/2013
welcome to bakersfield first assembly of god, if you are new we would love it if you filled out the connection card in the bullitin and bring it back to the welcome center in the lobby after the service where we have a gift just foy you!
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hah i am alive
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waffles this should be the main enemy of portal 2
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iFluTube ist cool
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Du bist cool
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There is never a time or place for true love. It happens accidentally...
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The crimson-copper drenched sheet lay in a wad on the streaked wood floor, coiled over the bloody body of an innocent victim. Well some might say she was innocent, if anyone ever knew her. The main form she took-her actual self-was a wretched wi
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here comes the
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watch out for the bass
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here goes nothing
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Hello, you have been selected to test
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Hello there I'm GLaDoS what is your name
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New G Studio
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Welcome, Jonathan, how are you? I really don't care
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I've wondered what is out there. I'm noticing that parts of the facility is being broken into. Cameras show things that I don't know. Are they humans?
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Hello Mr. Johnson
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Talking Like Glados is Amazing
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I love you. Even if you are a bit chubby.
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testin the glados voice
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Hello Miho. How are you?
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Someone has sent you a text message. I can't imagine why.
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orry about the quality of the test chambers. I'm just feeling a bit... unusual lately
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nono
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thank you for calling reliable pat testing! sorry there is know one to take your call at the moment so please do leave a short message and we will call you back
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DJ ZANDSTRA
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Hey One direction i hate you
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Harry Turner
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You're all going to die
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hi my name is tyler
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bonjour ! Je sui glados et je vais te tuer
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dcd
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game should create for us
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Welcome to Retro Gamers. You monster.
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YOU ARE STUPID
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You are a disappointment
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I need to take a shit
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william your phone is ringing
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oh.. its you
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oh it's you again, I've been really busy. since you killed me!
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Occupants life support systems damaged.
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blues are live
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I AM A RISING POTATO RANGER
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You are now watching Swaq Jones, and remember, please enjoy
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Hello. I am happy you came.
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Watch as I work my gypsy magic Eye of a newt and cinnamon Watch as the matter turns to batter open the portal, jump in!
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this is a test of the glados voice modulator
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and it is also a lie
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My Name is Leon, what's yours?
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Mario & Luigi: Dream Team is looking like it will more than make up for how disappointing Paper Mario: Sticker Star was to me.
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bien venido nuevo sujeto de pruebas... iniciemos usa la portalgun para crear 2 portales... muy bien ahora pulsa el boton
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Hello, I am going to be your Tank for this evenings raid
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hello dor i am glados
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hello dor i love banana and cake
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You guys, what is the whole point of this.....???
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Hello friend, you are stupid
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Hello friend, you are my hero
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neutroxin
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Have you ever stopped to think that there's a point where your name gets mentioned, for the very last time? Well here it is. I'm going to kill you, Chell.
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im on my level
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Decent.
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warning. oxygen levels below ten percent
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Welcome to the C. P. Torsco Production You Tube channel. As this channel is for fun, this channel may also be dangerous. As GLaDOS will attack your computer and find your home, invade, and demolish. I am GLaDOS if you do not know.
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What is wrong with you people?
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you are so horrible
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Hello, old friend. I want potatoes
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Shoot Them With Lasers
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Welcome to the Aperture Science Automated Defensive Suit, version Beta 2.0.
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Powering Down
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hello dalton. How mey I help you
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