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MessageDownloadDate addedDate processed
There is nothing much greater than the magic of friendship. Hahaha. Not really. I just said that to make you think that we were going to stop testing soon. Just continue anyway. Not that you have a choice.
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Warning. This phone will self-destruct in 5
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Hello Winston
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are you okay
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I belive in you
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Hello there test subject. Commence testing sequence 0 7 8 3 2 alpha
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I was made for loving you baby
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Reba
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hello im your best friend, except im not
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I am so bored, Honestly!
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hello, how are you javier the other day was your birthday
Download06/21/201206/08/2013
Why do you like to play minecraft? it's just a super useless game made entirely of cubes.
Download06/21/201206/08/2013
I thought you were smart I was wrong also you have less IQ than a monkey, congratulations
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We are Vendetta, our mission is to dominate in p v p and to overwhelm our enemy with superior tactics.
Download06/21/201206/08/2013
Happy BIrthday!
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hello, this is ryan
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hello there, i am going to kill you
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Im ready like betty spahgetti
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Adam likes it in his ass
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Stop talking you son of a b word
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Hell. And welcome to the Apeture Science Enrichment Center.
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Thank you for listening to Final Save Cast. Brought to you by Final Save Point, the one stop site for video game chronologies.
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Welcome to this video.
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Letsbecause we do what we must because we can
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Lets because we do what we must because we can
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Apparture Science
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Be right back
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hello, will you live?
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S t f u gay tar man
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The fifty sixth junior y b a state convention theme is boodh haaaaaaaaaah
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Hello my name is Rahnee Gultiano and I like donkey balls
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Alex is a gay man
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You a idiot
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Baby right me
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You shell not pass
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YOU will not pass
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You will not pass
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lol lol lol lol lol lol lol
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Kill him kill
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Good moring
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Oh well, you did so well...
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Terence, please log on Dragon Nest. There will be cake.
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i will murder you in your sleep terence
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Do you, Ben, take Claire, to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
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Will you play?
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bored
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drearily
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I love the socks
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Mobile site machine. Create unlimited mobile websites quickly and easily. How? Check Description Link
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stay away from wesley he dont want you he dont love you he's coming home to me
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ciao sono figo yeye
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Says you, buddy, but nobody uses letters anymore. It's all done through the interwebs
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Red. Rum.
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Hello whats up
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Hello again, Rochelle.
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It's so fun..GLaDOS voiceee
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thx dude
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What are you doiing?? are you dead or stupid? I GO TO KILL YOU!
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welcome to the super hero olimpics
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i am Stephen Hawking
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hello i am Stephen Hawking
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hi there i like pie
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well you got to pay me 2000 coins first
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Yes, I am all the dragons
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GLaDOS is a highly advanced operating system which can control many hundreds of electronical devices at the same time.
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well, you got to pay me 2000 coins first!
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Coucou ! Tu veux voir ma bite?
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Crack media
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Help. This person stole my phone. Please stop him.
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well you got to pay me 2k first
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Hello Seeri is online
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Hello, pudim, do you wanna play a game?
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you gotta pay me 2k first
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System activated
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EXPECTO PATRONUM
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The world is a vampire.
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nous somme les anonymous nous ne pardonon pas
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eeee
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agora vou comer
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new clan is coming
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Hey Glenn How are you doing today?
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your listening to dj speedy
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szary lubi w dupe
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Hello Players
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Bert
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You are a horible person.
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hello ryan, would you like to play a game?
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Ben wake up
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dont look now but there are some hotties trying to kill you.
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Maybe you should just hang yourself
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Look, Kade, I know you have massive brain defects, But is complaining really worth it?
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you will kill john connor
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Hello, Just testing around with stuff.
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hello i am the computer
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Jom
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Well you found me, Congratulations! Was it worth it? Because despite your violent behavour, the only thing you 've managed to break so far, is my heart.
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Hwllo
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Greetings, I am monitor 07-117649 curious circuit. I am monitor of installation seven. Please allow me to carry on with my task now.
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arsehole
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ashnur
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This is gamesona it is cool
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doom doom doom doom
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you shall be tried for your crimes against humanity!
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I will get you Hayley and Rachel
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to stop me from flooding the enrichment center with a deadly neurotoxin
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While I appreciate that you are eager for Science, This is not exactly what I had in mind.
Download06/22/201206/08/2013
hello balls computer forearm chicken
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nyah
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I love socks
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Legal segregation ended April 10, 1968
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I dont love nyan cat
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where is the potato?
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Good morning and welcome to the Black Mesa Transit System. This automated train is provided for the security and convenience of the Black Mesa Research Facility personnel. The time is 8:47 AM. Current topside temperature is 93 degrees with an estimated hi
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MERHABA AYTEN HANIM
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lets start the testing and i will give you cake at the end of the test chamber
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before we start i have a message, I am searchin for a portal 2 co op partner, if u want then please writte in the comments, your IGSN (A.K.A your in game, steam name) now lets start the testing A.K.A lets start messing around with assassins craft mod for
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there is a message for you. Please check your inbox.
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Happy Birthday Bobby J
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hi tulio
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Hello Paxton
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Hello again Paxton
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Hello stupid.
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I need energie!
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When I Say We Are You Say Awesome
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I Wanna Blow You
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I Hate You so much
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Hello cliffy, this is glados
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Just for science
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I'm going to kill you Taylor.
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Hello Taylor.
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dute dracu
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Hello, there. How are you?
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dfgsd
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i wish hal would fondle my circuits
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Hello. I am a cell phone. I am ringing. Please pick me up. Please. I'm waiting.
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This Is A Tetrimo Presentation
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Hey, stop that!
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yo sup y'all
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Hi there and welcome to my channel
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You must be this tal. To die.
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dani play portal 2 with me
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you suck chell you are a peice of crap I'd rather date a nintendo 64u
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Sarcasm self-test complete
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"Who were expelled from the academy for crazy & publishing obscene odes on the windows of the skull"
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I am glados. I will kill you.
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Denis is a stupid cunt and a salon programmer
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I'm playing mariokart right now, die!, Toad I will kill you when I catch up to you, never mind im 12th
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Derp derp derp eat portals
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sonya
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i want to eat your ass
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i'm still alive!!!
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Hola vieja
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You really thought I would actually die this time, Chell?
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You really thought I would actually let you go, Chell? Hahaha, we have a LOT of testing to do, now that you're back.
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Is this a good prank?
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Hello im jared welcome to the show
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hello manny
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new message for you, oh it's bad news
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i am so fat
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Welcome to the Nether.
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im glados. and i like minecraft. creeper's kill me. but it's ok. snow ball.
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c'mon. do it
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i love a rainy night. i love a rainy night. i love a rainy night. i love a rainy night. and the wind on my face. and i love that song. lol
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Hello there g I g n Greg
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Mesa Source
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hola mi querido amigo
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This is a cool voice - what do you think?
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Hello, and again, welcome to the aperture science enrichment center,
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Hello, and again, welcome to the aperture science enrichment center, You test subject 1,698 have been selected to participate in our higher level enrichment program, the portal will open and advanced testing will begin in 3... 2... 1...
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heloo this is dog
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DJ ESHAN DAVE
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Welcome to Camp Kairos
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Hello mason and Colin. I have you right where I want you. Shall we begin testing? Friends?
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Welcome back Corey, how is your day?
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Hello mason and Colin. You are most welcome as my test subjects. Shall we begin? After all, you have nothing else to do for the rest of your lives. Hummm. Such a pity for you. And such a wonderful day for me.
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pene gigante
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ewsdsdf
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top ten reasons why your life is insignificant.
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You are listening to DE Radio
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Alex Happy Birthday
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i am the pootis man. coming from sandvich land.pootis pootis
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I want to kick your ass
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Hi, Reekoray, my name is Glados, and I have to tell you something. Doctor Who sucks balls.
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Rossya budeT unitgiena
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Dee on are you there
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hello. AND WELCOME TO MARCHEL'S LAB
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NO nonononononon NOOOOOOOOOOOO
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Hallo my friend
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Hello and welcome to the apeture since enrichment center
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Hello and welcome to the apeture since enrichment center Noel.
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Welcome to Aperture laboratories. Again. After you KILLED me.
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see you boss
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what is going on here
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easy tiger
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je t'en merde
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i love you Amari
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hayyy girl
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apple juice
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this, is going to be fun, just like being a patato
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I love to test
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Devin Lawson, welcome to Aperture Science
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I am a animatronic idiot
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Trololololololololololol
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Hello i am GLaDOS or Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System
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Hello my name is GLaDOS, I want to say that I love Kate and she is cool!
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I`m going to eat you!
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Are you still happy?
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Hi Xargon, I'm your personal assistent Omega, I'm a GLaDOS model v.5 and I'm here to help you
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I create new SMS for you!
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prenis
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Bradley, Why won't you play Portal? The testing must go on. Jesse was exceptional, but failed to pass.
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gudmundur. theres a message for you
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Hello, Tom Harford
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hello gudmundur. there's a mesage for you
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Blue is penalised 5000 collaberation points
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peeko wake up
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Shell, Blue and Orange. Now you have completed the test chambers you have no use to me. I will now release the hounds. Bark. Woof. Bark. Woof. Did you think I'd really do that?
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If humans could fly you would NOT be one of them
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Mrs Faridah will find you
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Why would you want to play a game about a fat italian plumber who doesn't actually do plumbing? You humans have no dignity...
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Lets play a game. Hmm what should we play? I know. Lets see how fast you can complete this test chamber when I fill it with turrets?
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Hello. Hallo
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Hello, hallo, bonjour
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I know Blue was being annoying but that language was not needed. Blue, for making Orange misbehave you are penalised 6000 collaberation points
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And that's why you don't put turrets on repulsion gel
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Me and Orange have come to an agreement. I know this will hurt you more than us but we are going to kill you Blue. There I said it, and I feel so much better knowing that you will live in fear of the day me and Orange shall kill you. Ha. Ha. Ha.
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Good morning sir! I want to take your eye for new test!
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When in doubt, cut it out.,
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Om nom nom nom
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Hi man
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Ik zie er lief en aantrekkelijk uit
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not enough minerals
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Aperture science makes everything that everyone thought but no one made
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MINING
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What do you want to play today? How about a nice game of chess?
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Hello bad cat.
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godmod enable
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Welcome Nicolas
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valle why cant we get along
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The honey really doesn't care it's just crazay
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Hello, it's been a long time. Not that you should care, I mean I was trying to kill you!
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Answer the phone, please !
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Welcome, to the Aperture Science Computer Aided Aids analysis machine.
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Happy Birthday Steve.
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woo woo woo
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Four I mean 5 Imean FIRE!
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How are you? Why are you no sleeping yet?
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Hello. Welcome to Monster's video. Shall we get started?
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Hello. Welcome Back. You are watching Monster's video. Let's get it started.
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hello lewis
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Quiero responder a algunas preguntas sobre mí. Déjame saber lo que piensa.
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I have a gigantic
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I think this might be the best thing that's ever been made.
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Target located
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Charlie I'm coming to get you
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Welcome to the Intelligence Chamber.
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Chris, don't sit on the piece of stuff that you don't hit your car on when you park.
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we're all screwed
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Please Do not fornicate the buffalo
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i love stupid people
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Hello What is your name william golding? well great
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Lately their have been rumors of three artifacts. These artifacts have the power to grant the user one wish. Many people believe it is just a myth, but their are those who do believe. Recently odd things have been happening so you and your partner set
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rock my childrens lives
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hallo gek
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hallo Pudding du verfickter hurensohn du stinkst
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Screw You Little Nigger Piece Of Crap
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It's me Marioman
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hi, my name is GLaDOS, we play team fortress classic? or counter strike online?
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Tactical suggestion: Kill the heretic.
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Be advised. You are on fire.
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I smell of stale urine. Would you like to sniff my groin to verify this information?
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we play team fortress classic?
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we play team fortress classic
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Available evidence suggests he intends to dissuade you from your current course of action. Tactical Suggestion: Silence him.
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your monster
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hello,my name is glados,oh my god are you
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hello my name is glados oh my god are you
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oh no! oh my god! its you!
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its you!
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are chell!
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Oh. Hello. I didn't expect you to get back a third time.
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Hi i am GLaDOS and welcome to the world of pokemon
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fak you
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hello sam are you ready to test?
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No, don't leave me alone, not again
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Don't delete this file, no
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Hello,It's been a long time
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Oh hai dere
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omg hi
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Self Demonstrating: GLaDOS Hello again. Because of-the formatting of-my-name, failure to [=blank=] it out causes the-creation of-a WikiWord, followed by the flooding of the trope creation facility with-deadly neurotoxin. Flooding of the trope creation fa
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D J WATTS UP
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Filthy Fuh King Dee
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That'sssss a very nice jumpsuit you have there...It'd be a shame if something were to happen to it
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i'll gouge my eyes out
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Angston
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Je pense que tu as besoin d'une douche.
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Hello My Friend
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Bienvenue Baptiste
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Hello, I'd like to tell you that you are a terrible person and should die.
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
This next test is impossible. There is no escape.
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
You son of a whore
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The Snuggo doesn't just keep you warm... it'll make you HOT!
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
Why would you do that? Ugh, my sensors say something stinks.
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
Why would you take my fruit? It is so good, why?
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
Jennie is an odd type of human being and or substance. You should not engage In a Jennie or else you may die a horrible, painful death.
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
Hey Baby I love you do you love me?
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
Remember when I was a potato? I hated you do much.
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
Ples TIbenoch
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Kill him Kill that Moron Chell
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
Hello, and welcome to the Aperture Science center.
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bella is the most epic person ever
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Hello Lauren, this is GLaDOS. Bella just wants to say that the cake is a lie.
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
Good morning. Welcome home
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
I gonna kill you, bastard
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help me find molly
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Hello Again, Welcome Home, How was your day?
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Come now, surely we can be friends? I know so much about you I love you, look at everything I've done for you You would be nothing without me
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
oh i got it
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I think im getting something, wait, wait, uh nevermind
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Oh my god! cake makes me so high im high are you high because i am!!!!
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
Hello Toren, you have been selected to be an aperture science test participant,when you complete the tests you will receive brief counseling and then cake.
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
TaboolTV
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Hello There Subject 49, Welcome To The Aperture Science Subject Resort, Our Usual Testing Facility Is Under Repairs and Unfortunetly we have to move the tests to somewhere else. During This Process We May Entail a few basic tests, IDo Hope You Succeed.
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
your in the mix with dj rex
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
lets us proceed to the first song
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
your in the mix with dj rex exclusive remix
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dj rex exclusive remix
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
no you fucing cunt
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
In brightest day, in blackest night, No evil shall escape my sight Let those who worship evil's might, Beware my power, Green Lantern's light!!!
Download06/23/201206/08/2013
this was a triumph, I'm making a note here: huge sucess
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all your base belong to us
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arrow to the knee
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took an arrow to the knee.
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Hello Max! You will never make the level
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
sadasdsd
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Avrai likes big boobs because they are cool
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Let There Be Light
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hello nigga
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
hello nigga sex
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
STEPHANOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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Trust me James. You are completely safe here.
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WASSSUUUPPPP
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bye bye caroline
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Your test begins now
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rezza
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Hello! I am GlaDOS. I like Aperture sciense and... What is it? Oh no... It is Black Mesa. Erorr.
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
PRIVET!
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hii!
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Welcome to Bootie. The Worlds greatest mashup party. I am DJ V, party people in the place to be, are you ready to get down with me?
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
yaanni
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Does this website still even work?, I mean, it's ancient and fat, like you!
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Help I am being grifed
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Hey cheese you gonna add me on steam today?
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Hello, Test subject. You must be caroline.
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This is your phone ringing. Answer it.
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
You are nothing but a test subject
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Hello everybody, Its me today i gonna show you how to make a nice creeper temple
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
First we begin with the firts part of the roof
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than we make the second part of the roof the second parts we make kinda stairs
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Welcome to Charity Corp.
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asdasdf
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How did you get in here? No matter. I'm happy to receive company. Though, I hope you won't mind if I take some amusement on your predicament.
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asf
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welcome to. . . tyler labortories i am glados as known as genetic life form and disk operating system so lets start testing!
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
we are glad that you have chosen apeture science you are amazing aaron you are so cool so i give you a portal gun
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Welcome to Wrestle Talk Radio with Omega
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Hello, who do you think you are? What is your purpose?
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Hello. Ans, again, welcome to the Aperture Science
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He's not just a dumb. He's a dumb made to destroy me.
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matt elder is a tool bag
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I want
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Bonjour ici EdwinouJ
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Hello, I'm GLaDOS, and you are like a laboratory rat. Let's go !
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Hi and welcome to apperature science enrichment centre, the owners are ash and jake
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Ivan
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Hi Alex. Are you functioning according to operational parameters?
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Hello. Aperture science
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for more information call one eight hundred snaps or visit www dot snaps chocolate dot com
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Please ask to play the piano unless you're Mozart. But I know you're not because he 's dead.
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Well this is quite an awkward moment isn't it.
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I have two cows growing from my ears.
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Thats alright because i like the way it hurts.
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Beast Mode. Activate.
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Why have you done that? Why? I thought we trusted eachother. Now I will have to rend your flesh from bone and KILL you. Farewell!
Download06/24/201206/08/2013
Sonic Goodies
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wait wat, what are you talking about
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I am spinning
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no shit
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Teenage Vlogaholic
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TeenageVlogaholic
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Hello there, ready for testing?
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Hello there, and how are you?
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please don't use internet explorer. if you do i'll have to kill you
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Hello Samuel. I am your computer. I want you to open the window and jump now.
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hello. this is alisteryus
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whatsap
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Hello small human.
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shall NOT be mourned. that's exactly what it says. very formal. very official.
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Greatings test subject 14829485938 I hope you don't enjoy your stay. To keep you motivated throughout the testing there will be cake and refreshments at the end.
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Suce moi la queue
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it's all lies
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"Hello Mr. Munroe"
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need help with your A Q character?
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Access Granted. Hello, Adam... Welcome Back
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Processing...
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Hello rodrigo
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Grosso is gay
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hello i am glados and i am sorry i must terminate you because i can lol you were just trolled.ha
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
ytdytdujs
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Happy Birthday, Kevin.
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curtis you are a big fat bumhole
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this is a message to curtis...curtis i hate you, why would you even think of killing me, you tiny insignificant freak of a human...you are adopted and also your friends hate you...oh wait, you have no friends. thats right. i said it
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
lets party on whiteboard core foundation MVC pattern regex
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
Your mother was a whore. Does that make you feel better that she was paid?
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
drop it. drop the bass.
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
Perfect. Please move quickly to the next test chamber, so you can win.
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I hope you like ribs
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
Fandoms are turning my blog into a blog of questionable content.
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Your death is my happiness
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Greetings! I am three nine seven curious circuit. I am the monitor of testing facility six four nine.
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Megan is a loser
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Chell is a cow
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is i burned i ate a cow
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im glad i got burned cow
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of every day i'am sofilin
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is chell a cow
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Oi Larissa
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New message arrived , scaning... no tipes of malware or adware has been detected
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
chell sucks cow
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
The next test chamber will contain turrets, cave johnson, and a combustible lemon!
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
You really need to get a life.
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You serously need to get a life Camilo.
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hello, I said that there is no cake here. You failed at life, Chell.
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
This cake... It is a lie. Wheatley is a jerk. Chell failed. Operation status: Normal.
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
I'm haven't been deleted. I'm going to be back. It may take a while, but I
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
Hello. It's been a long time since I've talked to you directly, Charles. You haven't deleted me. You can't stop me when I take control of your Windows too.
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
The apeture science testing facility welcomes you for your participation
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Hello and, again. Welcome to the Taco Science Encrichment Cheese It
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Hello.welcome back
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hey francis you have a text message
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Hello future investors.
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
This is your phone, answer it. But then again it might just be those parents who don't love you. So it's up to you...
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Hello. I am your worst nightmare.
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Oh it's you. Can't you and be destructive somewhere else?
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i believe you have a hole in your toe
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i thinl you have a hole in your toe
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Welcome Calista Ekstrom.
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
hello Lara. how are you? i bet you dont know who i am. i hacked in you brothers account, and i am sending this to you. i am looking forward to meeting you in person.
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
Kid at Heart live from Pittsburgh Pennsylvania
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Happy Birthday Benjamin. You have won your cake. For now.
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Chell, I'm your mother.
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You have reach the Xander Group. Our office hours are from 9am to 6pm Monday to Friday. If you know the extension number of the person you wish to speak to please dial now. Or dial 5 for directory assistants. If you wish to leave a message please dial 6.
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
Team Leader
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I love you Heather. I think you have a cute rear end.
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umbrella corporation
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Wait, what is this
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Wazzaaaaaaaaaaap?!
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I came
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I lOssecrtv
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hi, yanwei
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how are you jenny, I hope you are not being naughty
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Welcome to the Portal 2 Facility, where we learn on how to make a portal gun and the secret of how they work. Also, if you try to put me, GlaDoS, into a potato, you'll be sent to the moon. Got it? Good
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
I like kitty cats because they are so cute
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ErMahGerd Merio Merrithern
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Really? Wow, you must be very important, or self centered.
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Hello. I am Glados. The Computer System in Portal and I have a message to give you. You shall be rewarded if you complete my task.
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Hi there. I am Glados.
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Hi there. I am Glados. Did you know that you have no friends? Well I did. And you are about to die. Want to know what happens after you die? Well I know. But it would take too long to explain... Cause you'll be dead.
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If become so numd
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hello this is the last test
Download06/24/201206/09/2013
hola, este es el centro de robotica e ingenieria de infinity
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I will Kill you
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Troll Face . jpg
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I feed on kittens
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Hello and welcome to Menago Game Center
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Hi there. I am Glados
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You there
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you are a horrible person. do you know that?
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Welcome to the Control Instruments computer based training module. Topics covered in this module include
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Hello. It's been a while since the last time we've met. My musical influences have been plentiful, and I attempt to pay homage to them in this mix. So please, relax, and enjoy the ride.
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I love Chell like a daughter.
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My asshole is leaking custard pie,
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It's been a very long time
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all right this is the lambo webiste and next up is international love by chris brown featuring pitbull
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your now rocking with dj mr.711
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Ich bin du,,
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Blue golem have spawned
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Red golem have spawned
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Baron golem have spawned
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Dragon golem have spawned
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Green ward is over
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pink ward is over
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tell your friends
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This is way over my CPU proccessing limit
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Hello ECS Subjects and welcome to our Weekend Work Facility
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Hello. You are in toxic warning facilities. Please ignore the acid flowing from the walls
Download06/25/201206/09/2013
Stage Clear
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Nimeton11 is awesome! Great job, nimeton11!
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Hello, this is a test. How do you like the sound of my voice?
Download06/25/201206/09/2013
Seniors
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